Brave

I did something today that was brave, risky, and possibly foolish. It's also something that, for however small it is, will quite possibly change my life in the most wonderful ways.

Backing up a bit- I've been having interviews to work at a local art supply store. And honestly, if money was tighter, it would be an awesome place to work. They're really nice, and it pays decently for a retail job. And yesterday they called and offered me a job. I gave it a lot of thought, talked it over with Charlie, and today I called and declined the offer.

I realize that turning down a good job in this sort of economy is in many ways a stupid decision. But I also think that for me, it was the best decision to make. I'm finally making headway in my art career. For some people, balancing that with a steady retail job is an ideal situation. But I know myself, and I know that I throw myself so wholeheartedly into whatever work I have, that there wouldn't necessarily be anything left for the art. And that's not okay with me.

I'm not planning to just sit at home and make toys and paintings. I'm also lining up some freelance illustration work, and I'm hoping to start teaching some art and craft classes. The whole idea is to make the work I do that isn't directly creating art be things that feed back into my creativity, things that inspire me instead of drain me. And for me, teaching a few classes does that.

I'm also fully aware that I can only do that because I'm so fortunate as to have a husband who's work pays the bills, and family and friends that would back us up if we hand some catastrophic misstep. More importantly, at least to my current mindset, is that I have a husband and family and friends who are supporting and encouraging me to pursue art. I am so lucky to have them all.

So yeah! I can't say I'm not nervous, but I feel deep in my depths that I've made the right choice. I'm an artist. Full on. It's my job.